The “Game” Plan
I’ve been considering working full-time on our projects. It’s a scary prospect of having financial commitments, a family, but zero income. At the same time, it’s incredibly liberating. I’m already so over the corporate lifestyle (of which there isn’t one). I’ve never enjoyed working for other people, corporations are so dysfunctional and in-efficient it just makes me want to scream.
I have enough good ideas of my own that I should be able to make it, but getting a start is hard when you don’t have a big parachute of money to keep you safe.
I’ve received a lot of support from friends and “aquired” family (I can’t think of a better word =P ), but my parents seem to think of life as a copy-and-paste affair. If they didn’t do it, neither should I. Apparently I should continue beating my head against the ever-growing corporate wall and ignore those little things called family and happiness. Why risk the financial stability I’ve established and be happy and close to my family, when I can keep working ad-finitum and never be home (family? I have one of those after 5:00!) just to pay for my son’s education (which he will get regardless) and eventually own a home and a backyard which I’ll have to find time to mow in the already non-existant space between slaving for an entity that doesn’t care for me and trying to get some sleep so I can do it all again next week?!
Selling my 5 days of the week only to use the other 2 trying to squeeze in time with my family, buying food, buying crap I don’t need and trying to forget the last 5 days I just threw down the toilet is not exactly my idea of living. Yes, I have a lot to be thankful for, the fact that I have a roof over my head, food in my fridge and that I can actually get a job is fantastic. Many people would jump at the opportunities I have. But if that is something that should stop me, then we should all just stay in our current situations until we’ve managed to bring every single person below us up. Which in our current political / economic situation, will never occur. I’m not saying we shouldn’t help those less fortunate than us, my god yes we should, but we also need to live our lives and strive to do our best and be happy with what we do and to bring happiness to others (if we ever manage to find the time =/ ).
My happiness? Writing games! Working for myself! Learning new ways to design and develop software. This is what I’ve always wanted to do (except for when I wanted to be an Air Force Pilot =P ). So I’ve been writing a business plan, listing the resources I have and what I can get, how much money I have and how much I might need. And… well… it’s scary stuff.
My entire family will be dependent on not just how quickly and well I can work, which is a function of how intelligent and dedicated I am, but also on the ideas I dedicate my work to. So essentially, the success of not just the business, but my family, is dependent on my intelligence, work ethic… and the type of games I enjoy. *BRAIN EXPLODES*
But I don’t think I have any other choice. My moods are all over the place. I’ve been really happy for the last year, but suddenly work has gone down hill and it doesn’t look to be getting any better for a long, long time. I’m stressed enough that I’m getting cluster headaches again which is a really, REALLY bad sign. Even though I sometimes feel good, sub-consciously there is a lot on my mind, and something is going to have to give.
So where is all of this leading? Well… I’ve got a few ideas up my sleeve to eventually divorce me from the monster that is corporate life and hopefully set Twisted Pair Development up as a respected independent game development studio with myself at the helm. I’m not sure about bringing some of my friends on board as I kind of burnt them last time I did something like this (sorry!), and I’m not sure I have enough confidence in myself to risk another person’s financial stability, let alone my own.
But the decision is made… I’m going to ween myself from the pusy bosom of corporate employment and try and start a new. I had already made some other major life style changes, why not one more?
How long will this take? I don’t know, but I hope soon (for my own sake). So expect to see some interesting news soon.